PHILADELPHIA – On a recent playdate at the park, Hailey Gorman caught up with The Satirer to express her growing frustration with not being taken seriously like the 10-month-old she is. “It’s always goo-goo-gaga this and coochy-coo that,” she explained, “as if they’re talking to someone who didn’t just master their ABCs.” Distracted by a chess match going on just behind her mother, Gorman unenthusiastically responded to a game of peek-a-boo, admitting she only plays along because her parents seem to enjoy it so much. Other adults surrounding the child’s bassinet fawned over her ability to sit up on her own but failed to notice her ability to roll her eyes. “I swear, every adult that interacts with me insists on using nonsense words and truthfully I find it incredibly condescending. If I didn’t pity them all so much I’d tell them to keep quiet so I could do my Sudoku in peace.” When asked if they were aware that their child was a baby genius, Gorman’s parents spit up on themselves and started sucking on their thumbs.
Baby Really Hates How Condescending You’re Being
More from PhillyMore posts in Philly »
- Report: Philly Accent Rated 74th Sexiest Accent In The U.S.
- The Release Of The New Movie Concrete Cowboy Has Philadelphians Saying, ‘Holy Shit, Idris Elba Was Here!?!’The Release Of The New Movie Concrete Cowboy Has Philadelphians Saying, ‘Holy Shit, Idris Elba Was Here!?!’
- Top Five COVID-Friendly Spots In Philly To Get Dumped In
- Reasons Your Friend Doesn’t Want To Visit You In Philly
- A List Of All 2 Major Rivers That Flow Through Philadelphia. You Won’t Believe Number 2!
More from The YouthsMore posts in The Youths »